TOP TEN SIGNS YOUR CLIMBING PARTNER MIGHT BE DANGEROUS
10. You often hear the faint clinking of Tequila bottles whenever he racks up.
9. Complains about cigarette burns making his rope "a b#tch" to rappel on.
8. Commands such as "Slack" and "Tension" must often be prefaced with "HEY! WAKE UP!".
7. Always 20 minutes late because he has to unwind climbing rope from Jeep winch.
6. On first night out in double portaledge, awakens you at 3am wondering "hypothetically"if Spectra would be damaged by spilled battery acid.
5. Been known to extol the virtues of the high-speed Dulfersitz.
4. Uses the words "granny knot" and "bomber" in the same sentence.
3. After fifth pitch, asks for water to wash down the Prozac.
2. Mentions wanting to buy new pro while thumbing through Ernst sale flyer.
1. Prefers clapping, rather than shouting to give encouragement while belaying.
List numbers 1-10 written by Peter Graff